Becoming the Person You Were Meant to Be: Where to Start by Anne Lamott

This article is also on I am inspired to share it here as it resonates so powerfully with my experience as a writer. Anne Lamott is the bestselling author of the classic Bird by Bird : Some Instructions on Writing and Life.

We begin to find and be come ourselves when we notice how we are already found, already truly, entirely, wildly, messily, marvelously who we were born to be. The only problem is that there is also so much other stuff, typically fixations with how people perceive us, how to get more of the things that we think will make us happy, and with keeping our weight down. So the real issue is how do we gently stop being who we aren’t? How do we relieve ourselves of the false fronts of people-pleasing and affectation, the obsessive need for power and security, the backpack of old pain, and the psychic Spanx that keeps us smaller and contained?

Here’s how I became myself: mess, failure, mistakes, disappointments, and extensive reading; limbo, indecision, setbacks, addiction, public embarrassment, and endless conversations with my best women friends; the loss of people without whom I could not live, the loss of pets that left me reeling, dizzying betrayals but much greater loyalty, and overall, choosing as my motto William Blake’s line that we are here to learn to endure the beams of love.

Oh, yeah, and whenever I could, for as long as I could, I threw away the scales and the sugar.

When I was a young writer, I was talking to an old painter one day about how he came to paint his canvases. He said that he never knew what the completed picture would look like, but he could usually see one quadrant. So he’d make a stab at capturing what he saw on the canvas of his mind, and when it turned out not to be even remotely what he’d imagined, he’d paint it over with white. And each time he figured out what the painting wasn’t, he was one step closer to finding out what it was.

You have to make mistakes to find out who you aren’t. You take the action, and the insight follows: You don’t think your way into becoming yourself.

I can’t tell you what your next action will be, but mine involved a full stop. I had to stop living unconsciously, as if I had all the time in the world. The love and good and the wild and the peace and creation that are you will reveal themselves, but it is harder when they have to catch up to you in roadrunner mode. So one day I did stop. I began consciously to break the rules I learned in childhood: I wasted more time, as a radical act. I stared off into space more, into the middle distance, like a cat. This is when I have my best ideas, my deepest insights. I wasted more paper, printing out instead of reading things on the computer screen. (Then I sent off more small checks to the Sierra Club.)

Every single day I try to figure out something I no longer agree to do. You get to change your mind—your parents may have accidentally forgotten to mention this to you. I cross one thing off the list of projects I mean to get done that day. I don’t know all that many things that are positively true, but I do know two things for sure: first of all, that no woman over the age of 40 should ever help anyone move, ever again, under any circumstances. You have helped enough. You can say no. No is a complete sentence. Or you might say, “I can’t help you move because of certain promises I have made to myself, but I would be glad to bring sandwiches and soda to everyone on your crew at noon.” Obviously, it is in many people’s best interest for you not to find yourself, but it only matters that it is in yours—and your back’s—and the whole world’s, to proceed.

And, secondly, you are probably going to have to deal with whatever fugitive anger still needs to be examined—it may not look like anger; it may look like compulsive dieting or bingeing or exercising or shopping. But you must find a path and a person to help you deal with that anger. It will not be a Hallmark card. It is not the yellow brick road, with lovely trees on both sides, constant sunshine, birdsong, friends. It is going to be unbelievably hard some days—like the rawness of birth, all that blood and those fluids and shouting horrible terrible things—but then there will be that wonderful child right in the middle. And that wonderful child is you, with your exact mind and butt and thighs and goofy greatness.

Dealing with your rage and grief will give you life. That is both the good news and the bad news: The solution is at hand. Wherever the great dilemma exists is where the great growth is, too. It would be very nice for nervous types like me if things were black-and-white, and you could tell where one thing ended and the next thing began, but as Einstein taught us, everything in the future and the past is right here now. There’s always something ending and something beginning. Yet in the very center is the truth of your spiritual identity: is you. Fabulous, hilarious, darling, screwed-up you. Beloved of God and of your truest deepest self, the self that is revealed when tears wash off the makeup and grime. The self that is revealed when dealing with your anger blows through all the calcification in your soul’s pipes. The self that is reflected in the love of your very best friends’ eyes. The self that is revealed in divine feminine energy, your own, Bette Midler’s, Hillary Clinton’s, Tina Fey’s, Michelle Obama’s, Mary Oliver’s. I mean, you can see that they are divine, right? Well, you are, too. I absolutely promise. I hope you have gotten sufficiently tired of hitting the snooze button; I know that what you need or need to activate in yourself will appear; I pray that your awakening comes with ease and grace, and stamina when the going gets hard. To love yourself as you are is a miracle, and to seek yourself is to have found yourself, for now. And now is all we have, and love is who we are.

I thought the secret of life was obvious: be here now, love as if your whole life depended on it, find your life's work, and try to get hold of a giant panda ~ Anne Lamott from her novel Hard Laughter

Let me know if you enjoyed this and be sure to pass it along to your friends through twitter and facebook, and anywhere else you love to travel online. As ever I love to hear your insights, aha's and anything else you feel moved to share ~ leave a comment below to add your brilliance!



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Intuitive intelligence: empower yourself through conscious intuition

• What if you could access any information that you wanted whenever you needed it?

• What if you could automatically download ideas and inspiration effortlessly and gain cutting edge innovative information that positions you as a major leader in your industry or field?

• What if you knew exactly what decisions to make and more importantly, exactly how and when to implement them to make the biggest, most effective impact in your career and life?

• What if you could access high quality cutting edge content that has never been accessed or shared before?

Imagine how much value you could potentially share with everyone.

The key to all this is knowing exactly how to access your intuition and how to empower your intuitive process and intelligence so that you increase your intelligence and IQ exponentially giving you access to any idea or information instantly.

I am moved to share this information with you through this intuition blog series because of the difference it has made in my life.

What I have found from my own experience of intuitive intelligence is that it is the key source to all your power: your confidence, intelligence and creativity, and ultimately, your success. The more you embody and get in touch with your intuition, the more unlimited you are.

Intuition is the single most empowering life design element that makes all the difference in your life – this is why I am sharing this now – I want to empower you with this vital information so that you can make the difference you are here to make. This is my strongest passion right now, so I am totally embodying it to ensure this information is yours.

Here’s what you get to take with you after reading this blog article series on intuition and intuitive intelligence.

You are going to get to

• Know not only how to access your intuition, but learn easy core intuitive strategies that you can use to increase your intuitive intelligence and abilities

• Develop and hone your intuitive skills easily and effectively through conscious use of your body and senses

• Understand the process of intuition more clearly so you can utilize it in any area of your life

• Learn why inspired intuitive action is the key to unlimited innovative success

• Strengthen your intuitive sense so that you can access it instantly when you need it the most

• Learn cutting edge – not shared anywhere else – intuitive intelligence strategies that you can share to add exponential value to the lives of those in your life either through content you create, products or the services you provide

• Know how to live and stay in the moment increasing your presence and personal magnetism so you can make the difference that you are here to make with confidence and ease

There’s so much more: intuition is the most powerful tool you can use at any time.

I am so excited to share all this with you! I can’t wait to hear the impact it has on your life!

This material is excerpted from my upcoming creative book series so you are going to be one of the first to access this material. You are getting a sneak peek!
Be sure to share this with your friends and family – this material is going to be life transformative and I want it to empower as many as possible – this is what is driving me the most at this time as part of my vision with my non–profit I am currently creating: Premakarini International ~ empowering everyone everywhere

Here lately I have been so excited I haven’t wanted to sleep because I am honoring my deepest dream and passion of taking my business to the next level so I can make a more significant impact and difference in the world through Premakarini International. This is who I am, essentially. I have spent most of my life helping in whatever way I can, but it’s time now to expand this into what it is wanting and needing to be. For me this is my whole motivation and passion and I am so excited to actually share this journey with you. And if you are moved to join me in this, in any way, please do not hesitate to let me know! I welcome all help, support – anything you feel moved to share – and be sure to let me know in the comments below how this inspires you. We are all here to inspire each other!

Stay tuned here at for more about Premakarini International: my current vision is to create homes with Habitat for Humanity as well as other non-profit organizations globally for families that need them the most to empower women and their families. I am going to need your help and support in getting the word out so I can raise at least $50,000 this year, ideally significantly more. I am currently developing ebooks and ecourses to raise this so I not only empower through information, but have the resources to share even more.

Okay so your first key to accessing and empowering your intuition:

Clear your mind: you have an estimated 60,000 thoughts every day, most of them repetitive and unproductive and this prevents your intuitional access in each moment.
When you clear your mind you not only increase your productivity, you raise your entire frequency of your energy and awareness empowering you to achieve more clarity, focus and presence. And you can access your intuition automatically because you will be clear and totally in the moment.

There’s an easy way to clear your mind and once you incorporate this in your daily life you immediately get the benefits and results:

Simply focus on your breath.

Just pay close attention to your breath and you take the focus off your thoughts and pull it back so you can direct it where you want it to go. At first it will keep going back to your thoughts. This is okay and to be expected. Just keep moving it back to your breath. It gets easier, I promise.

Here’s exactly what I do: I focus on how my breath feels going in and out through my nose. Focus totally on the actual sensation of the air going in and out of your body. Try it right now and feel the tension begin to melt from your body. Feel yourself coming more alive and gaining more energy with every breath. You are coming right into the moment.

The amount of focus you achieve directly determines the amount of energy, clarity and presence you have in each moment so give this all you got.

In later material I am going to share ways that you can significantly deepen and expand this process to achieve more powerful results – this is just to activate the process.
And the great thing about this intuitive tool is it’s so easy and immediate to use, you can use it anywhere and at any time so you can take advantage of this easily throughout your day.

When you begin to feel relaxed and clear simply pose a question to your intuition and wait for an idea to come into your mind. At first it may be easier to just carry on with your day and allow your intuition to find the information you want without putting any pressure on the process, but when you do this often you will get an immediate result.

Now go with what you got.

Even if it seems odd or unexpected. Especially if it seems intriguing or interesting: your intuition has been waiting to get this through to you, so do yourself a favor and at the very least check out what your intuition is giving you right now.
Act on what you receive. Put it to the test. This is important as you will find out in the next blog in this series.

Let me know if you enjoyed this – I love hearing any insights or experiences you have and this powerfully acknowledges and expands your learning with this process, so you get even more out of this. Please share this with others on twitter, facebook and wherever else you adventure online! It is especially powerful to share with your friends and family so you can share experiences and insights with each other.

Much love to you and your loved ones
Have fun playing with this
Until next time,

Are you on my list? Be sure to sign up so you don’t miss out on these unique advanced intuitive strategies that supply you with unlimited edge: again essential for you to be the leader you are and make the difference you are here to, which is what its all about, right?

Posted in CREATIVITY, creative genius + creative process, emotional awareness + quick emotional fix, INTUITION + intuitive edge, leadership, PASSION + creative passion, SHINE success + inspiration, vision, vulnerability + intimacy, WRITING
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8 Responses to Intuitive intelligence: empower yourself through conscious intuition

  1. Dyamond says:

    My intuition has definitely been what has led me to all that I’ve done today. I’m
    still trying to figure things out, and feel what it is I need to do. I’m sure this
    will help out bunches.

  2. Premakarini says:

    Isn’t it quite the adventure? I can tell from all that you share that you have been following yours! I love your blog and site. Its always so wonderful to see you on Twitter. Thank you so for adding your comments and getting the conversation here going! Let me know what this opens up for you and what insights you get from playing with this. So happy to see you on here.

  3. Jenny says:

    Didn’t know the forum rules allowed such brilliant posts.

  4. Rumor says:

    Action requries knowledge, and now I can act!

  5. Tiffany says:

    Thanks on your marvelous posting! I definitely enjoyed reading it, you’re a great author.I will be sure to bookmark your blog and will come back at some point. I want to encourage yourself to continue your great work, have a nice evening!

  6. Premakarini says:

    Tiffany, So happy you liked it. Thank you for your kind words + support, it means so much.

  7. Hollie says:

    Wow so glad I found this can not wait to try it thanks for sharing.

  8. Premakarini says:

    Welcome! You are so welcome! So glad that you are here. Be sure to come back + tell us how it goes: So love hearing experiences + ideas!
    Premakarini xo

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Emotional empowerment: Vulnerability + heightened emotions. Use the energy behind emotion to achieve more clarity, focus + get what you want

With all the heightened emotion you are seeing everywhere right now on a global level in response to the recent news of Osama bin Laden’s death, I wanted to share some insights that have helped me to maintain clarity and emotional stability when collective events such as this and 9/11 amplify our emotions and how you can consciously use emotional awareness to enhance your experience and free up even more energy to achieve better results in your life.

The ability to maintain clarity when you are emotional is critical. When you get overly emotional you experience confusion and lose the ability to make the right decisions and this can have a negative effect on your life.

As you are seeing, emotions are running high. A little later in this article you are going to see why and how this happens. But first let’s look at the experience of vulnerability, which is an effect of heightened emotion.

Everyone experiences their own unique vulnerability in response to the events that happen in their life. What few people realize is the actual power and unlimited energy source that they can tap into when they are willing to look at emotion a little differently.

So how to stay clear, and actually use emotion to add to your clarity and improve the quality of your life?

One thing that I am experiencing more of ever since I committed myself to the full on exploration of what it is to be completely vulnerable is that the more emotion you allow yourself to feel, the more empowered you actually are.

Emotion is fuel. Raw power. Being vulnerable in the way I like to play means being 100% open to what I am feeling and honoring this power source as it comes through me, without getting caught up in the actual emotion that it is coming through.

In terms of creativity, there is nothing quite like it. This is the secret behind most of the creative genius you have already experienced in your life, through your work and art, and also the work you admire. And most resonate with. This is the reason why you resonate with it. You can feel the raw energy coming right through what they do.

And it gets better:

When you allow yourself – give yourself permission to simply feel in this way, you quickly notice two things.

  1. You experience emotion, but you are not the emotion that is your experience. This frees you to use the emotions and feelings consciously, especially in the case of anger or fear and to tap the energy behind the emotion and put it into getting what you want. The extra energy helps you to get clear and to build momentum with your projects. Powerful stuff!
  2. When you have suppressed anger or any emotion in any experience, it waits for a trigger to break loose. When it starts to break loose and you play with it in this conscious way, you can actually use it in your creativity or to achieve your goals. Just see it as raw energy and power; don’t mistake it as simply anger or fear or whatever form it is taking. Often when you do this you come so alive, you are so in the moment, that powerful transformation happens and you begin to live at a new level effortlessly.

Explore this and experiment with this yourself. The next time you find yourself caught up in a feeling, simply focus on the intensity of the energy behind the feeling. Detach and watch what happens. Or, if you don’t want to wait: recall the last time you were really angry about something. Go back into the experience until you reach the intensity of emotion and play with it now.

With all the emotional outbursts around Osama bin Laden right now, it’s an excellent time to play with this as collectively there is a lot of emotional energy breaking loose at this time and this has the effect of amplifying everything making even more energy available so you can see how this works even more easily.

Let me know below how this helps and upgrades life for you!

Posted in CREATIVITY, creative genius + creative process, emotional awareness + quick emotional fix, SHINE success + inspiration
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Intuition: the secret to confidence

Do you have the confidence, or do you feel you have achieved the level of confidence required to consistently take action so you can get the results that you want and need?When you are confident, you are decisive. You have the ability not only to make snap decisions that are right for you; you also have the ability to act just as decisively and to make your life happen effortlessly as a result

99% of the effort involved – particularly in new ventures – comes from indecision and the inability to take action, which is due to lack of confidence.

You can call it second guessing, not being ready yet, needing another class or teaching, reading another book. But do yourself a favor and call it what it really is: a lack of confidence in your abilities.

So how can you achieve the kind of confidence that other more successful people seem to exude so naturally? What is the real difference between the quality of their life and your own? How can you develop the level of confidence and skills needed to generate the results you want in your life?

What is the real secret of success?

Confidence is just the ability to trust that you can tap into more power, awareness and intelligence as needed through your intuition. When you are confident, it is because you know and you feel certain that you know what you need to do and you are confident that what you do will achieve the exact results that you want.

You have this confidence either because you have practiced putting yourself in this situation so your confidence naturally stems from your experience.

But what about experiences that are totally out of your comfort zone?

For these you need some skills.

Confidence skills are actually easier to acquire than you think; in fact, if you can just keep thought out of the equation, your confidence can come through more clearly and allow you to have the level of insight and intelligence that you can use in any situation.

Try this: Take a situation that you have been overthinking and start from the end. Instead of wondering what you need to do and questioning whether this is the right course of action, feel that the whole thing is resolved. Imagine that you have the exact results that you want. Now work it backwards.

So, what did you come up with? Explore this and let me know how this helps you below.

Posted in emotional awareness + quick emotional fix, INTUITION + intuitive edge, SHINE success + inspiration
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Success: a question of strength

{Why consciously developing core strengths is the key to your creative success}

Success requires boldness, boldness requires strength.

The level of success you experience and reach is determined by your level of confidence. And yeah, you know it: confidence requires strength. Confidence is ultimately your awareness of your strengths, of what you are capable of, and when you haven’t put yourself consciously in enough challenging situations, you have no idea of the actual strength you are rocking… but to face challenges at this level, and with this level of awareness, it requires a certain level of confidence. You see the catch 22.

So how do you develop the level of strength and awareness to get you into this game?

If only there was a kind of password strength test for confidence and character skills before you faced your next challenge. Imagine how you would completely rock it, if this were the case…

Well there is, well kind of.

I have been playing with various tools and techniques to test just this, so that not only do I have the courage and confidence to try just about anything, I can accurately assess my skill level to see if I am prepared, and if not, what I can do to create the level of confidence required to not only rise to the challenges as they present themselves, but to successfully navigate pretty much through anything.

Here are some of the insights from the edge, just to give you a preview:

  • The more you consciously engage life, the more you level up in terms of challenges: this is how you grow and develop skills just like in a video game. However, just as in video games, there are certain techniques and tools that you can access and use to your advantage which means not only do you play the game better, it makes it more fun.
  • Big picture perspective: if you can gain an overview of what is actually happening, life gets exponentially easier. This is the ultimate game changer.
  • With the right technique, just about anything is possible. It’s so essential to explore new tools and ideas and ways of thinking so that you can begin to access not only the right tool or technique, but you can create your own to go to a whole new level.

More to follow, or while you are waiting, you can read other posts in success for more like this. What does this inspire in you? Leave me a comment below sharing from your experiences, or how this helps you. Till next time.

Posted in SHINE success + inspiration
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